My Mum

October 30, 2021

Today is the 7th anniversary of my Mum’s passing, a very emotional day for me and one that gets me thinking. I find it very cathartic to write down my thoughts and memories, so what better way than to write a blog post.

When I was born I became Mum and Dad’s fifth child, as the years passed by Mum became both a Grandma and Great Grandma.

My earliest memory of my Mum was as a three year old riding my little red trike in the breakfast room under the table, and going round and round straight through a pile of dirt Mum had swept up. Mum looked at me raised her voice and said “Julie Hazel” but at the same time she had a great big smile on her face.

Before moving to Buckinghamshire we lived in Coulsdon, Surrey. Mum organised my birthday parties they were always simple yet great fun with games of tug of war and oranges and lemons.

One year Mum and Dad took my brother and I out on a boat trip (but I might be wrong as my sister GAL took the photo).

We moved to Buckinghamshire because of Dads job. While Dad often had to work away from home, Mum was the one that insured spellings were done and reading homework was always completed.

I won’t though forget what a brattish teenager I was and how I could make Mum’s life hell when she was trying to run the house etc when Dad was away. I don’t think Mum ever forgot it either because when SMD was about fourteen I accused her of doing something and my Mum kindly reminded me that everyone wasn’t like I was at that age!

Christmas’ Mum always made very special and it wasn’t unusual when we lived in Flackwell Heath to have twenty plus people sit down for Christmas lunch. When Mum and Dad moved to Bedfordshire my sister took over the mantle of being the one that has everyone at her table for family events. Although no longer cooking Mum was the first one after Christmas lunch to take part in various board games.

Mum of course was right by my side when hubby and I got married and I will never forget the night before our Wedding day the words of wisdom and the reassurance she gave me.

Mum was incredibly supportive to me when I was diagnosed to have MS but she always carried the guilt for two of her daughters being diagnosed, despite being told how can it be her fault. As my involvement in the Chilterns MS Centre increased Mum would come along to the annual art exhibition and other events.

Mum also knew the importance of my relationship with my bestie LM. Whenever she came over from New Zealand, Mum and Dad always popped by to say hello.

Mum seemed to be the one taking the photos so I don’t have many of the two of us together but treasure the candid ones that I do have, taken when she was unaware or those when we insisted she took part in a group shot.

In 2012 I asked Mum to complete a book called From You to Me, which is a Journal of her lifetime and although like me she suffered in the last few years of brain fog and dates maybe incorrect, the book gives me a real insight into her life.
I really recommend that anyone who reads this blog to know the importance of understanding the history etc of where your parents came from. If you can convince your parents to complete this journal (there is one for Dads as well) then do so. The book will make a great present if you are stuck for ideas.

Not long after Mum passed away my Dad was given a Dalia called Eveline (my Mums name) which was planted in the garden. When he moved to Hayling Island with my sister and family they brought the Dalia with them. I now have tubers from that same Dalia growing in my garden and today I took a cutting and lit a candle.